After a long time
Strange that I will be posting this after a long period of inactivity on my blog. This is the reply to a mail sent by a friend concerning treating women in a good way – I wrote straight from my mind. Here it goes –
Good one …. Good points.
But note this that some men are ready to treat women as their princess. But most times regret it so much that the next woman who comes along suffers it.
It has been discovered that women like their men to be strong and totally in charge, even at times a scolder. When I was in school, I realised that the rough guys who are OSOMOs get the babes, while the cool guy does not.
Ask good guys around, and they will tell u that if not for the fear of God, they would have resolved to the normal way ‘cos they always regret treating women with due respect.
When you overlook a woman’s fault, she says u are not assertive. When you forgive her, she believes you are being too soft. When you don’t touch her enough, she says oh, he does not love me. When you don’t talk much,she says he does not like my company. Note that when you do all these things, she will still complain – he does not forgive, he is too assertive, he pesters me for sex, he talks too much.
And one lesson that will help you – Most good girls tend to think too highly of themselves, fine it is ok especially when you are one of the few good ones. But note that when it goes too much into ur heads, it will surely affect your relationships. They tend to tell their guys you are lucky to have me, you must do everything to keep me, I am more than special and sometimes when they are even married; fail to take care of the guy ‘cos they feel they have given him the best gift in the world by marrying him – Alas, have you ever thought also that good men are scarce too. In fact a good man is more scarce than a good woman! How? Ok, I will explain. Note that our society and world gives the man more space to commit adultery and polygamy. Some religions even advocate it and no religion advocates a woman having 2 husbands. If I have an extra-marital affair, my mother-in-law will call me and talk to me to please change my way and not break her daughter’s heart. But let my wife be suspected of that; her own mother will flay her!
I am in no way encouraging immorality, I am just trying to correct an anomaly in ladies’ thinking that is destroying marriages presently, especially marriages of good girl/guy. I have spoken to married couples in this shoe and have learnt a lot from them. Some of them confessed that their wives gave them hell after marriage, but it started from their dating days which they overlooked. Some have been able to overcome the challenges by sitting down and discussing, making the woman to understand they are human too and need some pampering and respect ‘cos they are also ‘good guys’. But some are still struggling and told me that a more experienced, formerly worldly girl who repented would have been a better choice for them as those ones already knew life and how important and hard it is to get a good man.
In all these, I guess the solution is to have a heart of truly love, where both the man and woman have mutual love and respect for each other, not taking each other for granted. Note that I am not talking generally about men, but I am talking about good men who have resolved to love their women and not mess up. Help these men out, appreciate them, do those little things for them(should not always be one way) and see if they will not continue loving you…. otherwise you are going to start giving them opportunities to taste goodness outside.
I did not plan to write this long, but I guess it is necessary!